Thor the Conqueror (1983)

Thor the Conqueror

Trying to find information on Thor the Conquerer is difficult as this 1983 Italian film isn’t an obscure cult classic rather a forgotten artifact from a time when cheap movies were being made at an extraordinary rate. It is evident within the first few minutes of the film that the production value, acting, narration, and pretty much everything else is going to be on the level of a high school project. It is also evident at the first battle scene, that this movie is going to be for certain audiences…

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Sorceress (1982)


“The evil wizard Traigon must sacrifice his firstborn child in order to maintain his powers. This prompts Traigon’s wife to run away after her twin daughters are born. When death is near, she gives the girls to the warrior Krona, who has promised to take care of them and raise them to be exceptional soldiers. Twenty years pass, and Traigon begins to hunt for his daughters to make good on the sacrifice, and the twins, now skilled in warfare, are forced to do battle with their father.”

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Aquaman (2018)

It has been a while since I wrote a movie review to the point of being nervous if I still knew how to review a film. I do not think I ever knew how to write a review rather I just enjoy throwing my opinion out regardless if people want to to hear it. The last film I reviewed was the Indian epic Balhubali and before that the Spielberg retrotrip Ready Player One. There have been a handful of movies I could have done before the newest DC superhero movie…

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Baahubali: The Beginning

Okay, there is a lot to talk about. Even though Indian action movies haven’t been explored on this site, Baahubali fits into any realm of interest for people who could adore epic narratives. Touted as one of the most expensive films at the time of its release, Baahubali: The Beginning unfolds the tale of love, betrayal, glory, and tragedy in a two and half hour introduction to the lays of a guy who can hit a lot of people using other people. Indian action films have a tendency to bleed…

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Ready Player One (2018)

ready player one

Ready Player One is both the name of a 2011 science fiction novel by Ernest Cline as well as the 2018 film adaptation by Steven Spielberg. What is funny about the gap between the book and the film release is distance we as a culture have traveled in terms of interest and tolerance for referenced material. From the genuine excitement for films like Lord of the Rings and X-men to the almost pitiful pleas for films not based on books, we as a culture have endured the trials of adaptation.…

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The 300 Spartans (1962)

If you were around in 2007, you might remember a colossal film called 300. It was pretty popular. 300, directed by Zack Snyder, popularized the Battle of Thermopylae to a new generation of moviegoers as well as giving other films creative license to overuse CGI in their action. If you were not aware of the 1962 film The 300 Spartans, which basically covered the same narrative, do not fret as the older film has been relegated to the dusty shelves of history. Whether overshadowed by Ben Hur released 3 years…

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This article starts my relapse into the world of 80’s fantasy films. Though I seemed to have covered a broad range of classics like Fire and Ice, Conan The Barbarian, and Highlander, there exists a wider landscape of movies that all are either terrible or wonderful or both. Whether nostalgic for some or completely new to others, these films come equipped with some of the greatest taglines in history: “A demonic wizard challenges a modern-day computer programmer to a battle of technology vs. sorcery, with the programmer’s girlfriend as the…

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Warcraft 2016

It is hard to think of anyone who hasn’t at least heard of World of Warcraft. The fourth installment of the video game franchise produced by Blizzard became a cultural phenomenon following its release in 2004. World of Warcraft and the idea of Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games (MMORPG) became entwined with one being introduced with the other. That was 8 years ago and World of Warcraft has gone through 5 expansions with the newest set, Legion, being released in August. It is not difficult to see why the…

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HÄXAN (1922)

Holy shit guys and girls. So recently I have found myself drawn to early fantasy, science fiction, and horror of the silent film era. In the last review, we took a trip to the goddamn sun with George Meleieis Impossible Voyage. I enjoyed the films of the early 20th century for their brevity where 20 minutes was adequate time to digest wondrous travel. Now we have a film which is not only 2 hours in length but is probably one of the more dense subjects tackled in early film making.…

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A few years ago, for the months of Autumn, I ran through the highlights and gems of early Horror beginning at the Phantom of the Opera in 1925 all the way to the early 60’s Hammer films and the revitalization of classic monsters. It was during this point that I found myself drawn to early cinema as a bold frontier in film-making, as many aspects that have become commonplace in cinema were still being toyed with and experimented. Take this and add the theme of fantastic storylines and one has…

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Jesus, I really do not want to be negative but these current fantasy films are sort of making me this way. I am always timid when it comes to criticizing music albums, but find myself more desensitized toward films. although just as much hard work goes into a film as an album, the blame for bad cinema can be spread over a larger party including director, writers, actors, editing, and just about everyone involved. This may be the case for The Crown and the Dragon. I will even track down…

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SINBAD – The Fifth Voyage (2014)

If you recall, I enjoy plunging myself head first into spans of film genres. One can look at each film genre as a great adventure and relish the time spent learning about nuances and origins of the style. If you also recall, I ran through classic horror for the Halloween season followed by a gallop through 1960’s Italian Sword and Sandal. These two exploits were propelled by my first film genre foray into Sword and Sorcery from the 80’s and 90’s. To mark a great conquest across fantastic filmmaking, I…

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HERCULES IN THE VALLEY OF WOE [Maciste contro Ercole nella valle dei guai] (1961)

Hercules in the Valley of Woe (1961)

I am glad you have traveled with me this far. I understand that sticking with certain film series can be trying especially when things get really bad. The 40’s monster rally series was also poorly done, but not like this. The 60’s Italian sword and sandal craze started out decent enough, but quickly plummeted into abysmal quality. If previous entries can be surrendered to cheesy escapism, the 7th entry in the Hercules series is one of the most disposable and needless developments the genre has ever seen. I may be…

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HERCULES IN THE HAUNTED WORLD [Ercole al centro della terra] (1961)

Ercole al centro della terra (1961)

As we approach the fourth Peplum review it is important to note that we will be skipping in continuity. I understand that the adventures of Hercules, played by different actors and with non connecting storylines, may already feel disconnected, but for the sanctity of criticism we will mention the break in sequence. Ercole al Centro della Terra, translated Hercules in the Center of the Earth but for some reason titled, Hercules in the Haunted World, is the 6th film released in the Hercules series. Our hero is played by another…

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