Hollywood Metal

REVIEW: SUIDAKRA

Posted on June 14, 2013 by Jeff Kroeger

SUIDAKRA – Eternal Defiance (2013)

SUIDAKRA
Album: Eternal Defiance
Released: May 24th, 2013
Label: AFM Records
Website: Official Website

Score: 4/9 Hammers

Suidakra’s eleventh studio album, “Eternal Defiance”, opens with a thunderclap that gives way to regal horns, strings and militaristic drums. It’s the sort of music that I might have mistaken for the “Game of Thrones” theme song had I been less informed, and when this initial musical statement fades into the sounds of a battle I feel like I’m listening to audio from a sword-and-sworcery period film. It’s a striking artistic declaration, and sets a tone that the band, to their credit, maintains for the entirety of the album.

“Eternal Defiance” is a Rock Opera that chronicles the rise and fall of a young warrior who apparently is based on Roman Emperor Magnus Maximus. In their quest to bring this story to life, the band trots out just about every Fantasy Metal cliché you can think of. Bagpipes dance over palm-muted guitars as they join drums in tight march rhythms, a wash of synthesized horns and strings provide a suitably grandiose backdrop for the three vocalists as they spin tales of wartime glory, and you better believe there are acoustic ballads. However, while it’s all very extravagant and skillfully arranged and performed, but more often than not it feels very commonplace. The chord progressions are all very tonic-centric, almost every song has a one-note breakdown, and I swear I’ve heard the gradually harmonized string stabs in “Defiant Dreams” in about a million other pieces of music. Even the album’s imposing opening declaration feels all too familiar. The banal music is then presented in a package of lifeless, brickwalled production which does not help matters at all.

Additionally, I find the lyrics to “Mindsong” to be silly rather than touching, the synthesized orchestral instruments are too obviously fake for my liking, and I was not a fan of Tina’s vocal style when it was being utilized by Joan Jett and Pat Benatar. And while the band’s zealous dedication to their musical vision is impressive, it’s also a little alienating. I can’t help but feel like the band is speaking to an audience that I am not a part of, like maybe people who are fanatics for the aforementioned T.V./book series or who play a certain easily-abbreviated role-playing game… or who just really like Folk Metal. No judgments here.

That said, there are individual moments on the album that I enjoy, like the chorus of “Beneath the Red Eagle”, the delicate instrumental section that precedes the vocals in “Damnatio Memoriae”, and many of the rich vocal harmonies. In fact, for the first couple of songs I’m more or less on board, but the band just cannot keep my attention. Ultimately, this album is just a collection of things that I’ve both heard before and would rather not hear again.

Posted in Reviews | Tagged Eternal Defiance, Hollywood Metal, Jeff Kroeger, SUIDAKRA |

FILM REVIEW: THE SWORD AND THE SORCERER

Posted on June 5, 2013 by Kaptain Carbon

The Sword and the Sorcerer (1982)

THE SWORD AND THE SORCERER
Released: April 23, 1982
Directed By: Albert Pyun
Starring: Lee Horsley, Kathleen Beller
Website: IMDB

Score: 3/9 Hammers

Well, it looks like I have a long line of sword and sorcery films from the 1980’s so let us pray that one of them is halfway decent. This is why I am reviewing the 1982 American fantasy film The Sword and the Sorcerer rather than the 1983 Argentinian film Deathstalker. I have been to dark places with 80’s fantasy films and some of the places are filled with things I’d rather not write about that are covered in mud. Albert Pyun is an American director best known for his near trash action films including that one sci-fi martial arts movie starring Van Damme, the Captain America movie from the 90’s everyone makes fun of, and a bunch of other films starring athletes instead of actors. Pyun’s best known work, oddly, is an early 80’s fantasy film which blurs the line between generic fantasy and fucking complicated fantasy.

The one unifying aspect of all sword and sorcery films — impractical headgear.

The film starts with a particularly dark introduction of our antagonist, King Cromwell, reviving a long dead sorcerer, Xusia of Delos, to aid him in his conquests over the perfect King Richard, who resides in the frilly flower kingdom probably named the unicorn vale or Ehdan. Xusia is awoken by one of his disciples from a coffin made of screaming faces, which even today is halfway between unnerving and fucking horrifying. This pact doesn’t last long as Cromwell literally takes 15 minutes to stab the sorcerer and throw him off a cliff. For a demon sorcerer, Xusia sure is a little bitch. For those keeping track at home, that is where the sorcerer part of the title comes from. Now what about the sword?

Over across the magical lake in the unicorn vale lies King Richard’s family, perfect and blond haired and everything. Cromwell seizes the land and eventually kills Richard in front of his son Talon who then rushes to save his mother only to watch her get slaughtered by him too. Damn that man is fast. Talon then takes up the family sword, which is a triple blade that shoots sword missiles to become the greatest fighter of all time. You read that right — fucking sword missiles. If I could call this movie anything it would be “The Sorcerer and the Fucking Sword That Shoots Goddamn Missiles.”

The Sword and the Sorcerer is a lot of things, which is part of its critical disfunction. First off all, the film takes place, chronologically, between sword and sorcery and high fantasy. The film shares more in common with a Roman time period leading to a complicated genre of sword, sandal, and sorcery. Some people may argue why a deviation of genre would matter but a story can get complicated and lost when wandering away from a simple formula. Things are not helped when The Sword and the Sorcerer adds in a handful of needless subplots that turn what should have been Eddings into Erickson. That’s right, I’m not fucking changing that line.

Xusia of Delos — Light Bright Sorcerer

Through a series of really fucking complicated events, Talon rescues the princess Alana who is sister to Prince Mikah who fighting for his rightful heir to the throne who was also captured and then escaped and then came back led into the castle by Cromwell’s consort who everyone thinks is Talon’s lost sister but its not but then she dies brutally in front of Talon’s band of mercenaries who are also trying to save him while he’s being crucified at the marriage dinner which is actually just a ruse to assassinate the four kings of neighboring lands but they all join Talon who eventually kills Cromwell and the evil fucking sorcerer who has been doubling as Cromwell’s advisor and also the first informant who tricked Mikah into the castle in the beginning. See? Simple.

The Sword and the Sorcerer could have been a simple action genre hit if it had spent less attention slicing the plot with a weed whacker. There is no need to have the main character be both the gruff anti-hero mercenary and the revenge driven prince. There is a reason why they are two different archetypes as they are motivated by two different things. There is also no reason to have an evil sorcerer narrative if one is going to muddy it with a revolutionary plot. To be honest, the only redemption for The Sword and the Sorcerer besides the sequel, that was made decades later starring Kevin Sorbo, is that Talon’s sword shot fucking missiles. Usually that is enough to carry at least 3 movies and a comic book but somehow everyone dropped the goddamn ball.

I know I will hit some lows in my quest to see every 80’s fantasy movie made. The Sword and the Sorcerer does have the benefit of not being filled with a litany of near fantasy rape scenes perpetrated by pig monsters and deviants. Even the gratuitous nudity scenes are halfway respectable. I’m not naming any names but Deathstalker, you should be paying attention. Aside from this momentary glimpse of redemption, The Sword and the Sorcerer reminds us why it has been forgotten.

Posted in Film Review | Tagged 80s Fantasy, Hollywood Metal, Kaptain Carbon, Sword and Sorcery, The Sword and the Sorcerer |

REVIEW: MR. FASTFINGER

Posted on May 31, 2013 by Kaptain Carbon

Mr. Fastfinger – Stringweaver (2013)

Mr. Fastfinger
Album: Stringweaver (EP)
Released: May 21st, 2013
Label: Elektrik Pyjamas
Website: Facebook

Score: 7/9 Hammers

Wait. Why am I here? Hello? Hey, is this because I did a review on Altar of Plagues. Was that too hip for you guys behind the two way mirror? I’m sorry alright. What is this? Where am I? What does this pamphlet mean about rehabilitation through shred guitar? What is that funny smell? Why am I getting sleepy? Why is the floor above me? Help!

The world of virtuoso guitar based music is a funny one. The music is both performance and exposition based on exercises to showcase talent. Because the music is so purpose driven, aesthetics usually fall on the fun if not silly side. Take Mr. Fastfinger and his band and take his new EP Stringweaver and then decide which level of seriousness you would like on the side. While my original summation of this music may seem a bit negative, I haven’t even gotten to the part about how fucking fun it is to listen to.

Mr. Fastfinger is an avatar for Mika Tyyskä and began as an animated guide to guitarshredshow.com, a combination of music game / online tutorial which sort of just became Tyyskä. Virtuosos are not above artistic personalities. In fact, I think it is sort of required. Mr. Fastfinger and his band have had two reasonably publicized records and now a 4 song EP thrown in the middle of 2013. Oh, did I mention the whole kung fu motif? No?

It may take a little while to adjust oneself but once positioned correctly, virtuoso music can be rewarding and damn entertaining. Because talent is the main priority, songs will be incredibly accessible, smooth, and with little challenges. That is of course, unless we are talking about bass virtuosos. Yeah, that’s right Jaco and Victor, I am looking right fucking at you. Much like Yngwie Malmsteen, Buckethead, and everyone’s favorite quad neck shredder Michael Angelo Batio, Mr. Fastfinger constructs songs that are more like water slides which do 5 loopy loops and send the listeners through seven hoops of fire all while on a motorcycle. It’s the strangest water ride ever.

Stringweaver follows the very well planned and thought out Motion in 2012. While Motion had a larger story and structure, which I am sure involved fighting, Stringweaver seems to be a transition record. While the larger narrative is gone, the short 18 minute running time allows for the music to be heard, enjoyed, and remembered without wearing out its welcome. Whether or not it is the chiptune flash of “Awaki-Waki” or the subterranean maze of “Nightvision,” everything on Stringweaver stays for the perfect amount of time.

Music like this sort of skirts criticism because of its nature of levity. If I were to point out any flaws, it would be the occasional use of vocals done in the voice of the kung fu character. Really though, if I am this far down the water slide and I am going to complain about a virtuoso record not being serious enough then I have a problem. Mr. Fastfinger’s Stringweaver is a competent and fun album made by musicians who have a desire to teach and make the world a fun, guitar-filled place. Who am I to complain anyway? This gas has made everything alright again.

Posted in Reviews | Tagged Hollywood Metal, Kaptain Carbon, Mika Tyyskä, Mr. Fastfinger, Stringweaver |

REVIEW: ALTAR OF PLAGUES

Posted on May 24, 2013 by Kaptain Carbon

Altar Of Plagues – Teethed Glory And Injury (2013)

Altar of Plagues
Album: Teethed Glory And Injury
Released: April 30th, 2013
Label: Profound Lore
Website: Facebook

Score: 8/9 Hammers

Woah, this is hip. When did everything become so aware and cool? Just like with Portal and Paysage D’Hiver, I am cashing in a stretch ticket and trying to get atmospheric black metal into the realm of epic metal. Come on, just squeeze. I do not think I would have pushed for Altar of Plagues third album so much if it were not for the album being absolutely stunning. No, seriously, it is really good and quite cinematic. You just have to know a few things before we begin.

Altar of Plagues began as any normal atmospheric black metal band would begin. They fit neatly into the then third wave style of post rock influenced transcendental quasi black metal. The band’s second record, Mammal, was a spectacular genre piece that even sidled up next to albums like Wolves in the Throne Room’s Two Hunters and Agalloch’s Ashes Against the Grain. It was easy and predictable. My reflection on Altar of Plagues’ past work only feels critical considering their newest work Teethed Glory and Injury is not only one of the most interesting releases by the band but it has damn near shattered my 2013 knowingly and with malice.

From various interviews the band has set out to either redefine their sound or bypass past convention. Third wave black metal has always been marked with an experimental spirit but Teethed Glory and Injury’s structure is so different than what came before I am almost jarred by the transition. Instead of the few song/long track format, each of the 12 selections from the album is slim and filled with serrated tension. The black metal sections are varied but attached with undertones of industrial, grind, and a general avant direction. The transition between tracks comes with a deliberate seam. If the contorted dancer on the cover wasn’t subtle enough for you, Teethed Glory and Injury is an art school collapsing existentially.

You see, I poke fun at its non costumed nature at times but Teethed Glory and Injury is more effective at bare emotion than some venerable black metal. Without pageantry the band is fluid and is allowed to go wherever the album demands. There is also no reason to rest once the band has achieved a certain sound. Heavy riffs, shrieking, and blast beats do not make an album good but rather what those elements do within the space do. Songs like “Remedy and a Fever” and “Twelve was the Ruin” with their wrought tension could not exist in metal records that did not have a dire purpose and strive. Black metal as a tool and not an end goal should be inscribed in stone about this record.

Of course, I enjoy genre and the occasional costume. I feel heavy metal has become what it is because of image and allure. Altar of Plagues achieves its success because of a straying from convention. Mammal was also marked with the feeling of artistic creation but Teethed Glory and Injury feels more effective when not surrounded by others. Altar of Plagues moves closer towards bands like Dodecahedron, Wreck and Reference, and Colbalt. The collapsed art school crowd. Black metal as a tool forever more.

Posted in Reviews | Tagged altar of plagues, Hollywood Metal, Kaptain Carbon, Teethed Glory and Injury |

FILM REVIEW: THE BEASTMASTER

Posted on May 8, 2013 by Kaptain Carbon

The Beastmaster (1982)

THE BEASTMASTER
Released: August 20th 1982
Directed By: Don Coscarelli
Starring: Marc Singer, Tanya Roberts
Website: IMDB

Score: 4/9 Hammers

Stay beast, I was born in the belly of a cow, so I am kin to you.

Oh man is it too late to take back the implication that Red Sonja was the worst Sword and Sorcery film of the 1980s? Maybe. Maybe not. The Beastmaster, the film, was released the same year as Conan and was a part of the first wave of fantasy films to explode in the 1980´s. The film would see mild success followed by continual replay on late night cable. In fact, this film is the epitome of late night cable. The Beastmaster is one part fantasy, two parts animal wrangling, and three parts “wait, why in the hell are they going there?” It’s not too late to retract my Red Sonja judgement is it? Please tell me no.

The Beastmaster is loosely, kinda, not really based on a 1959 Andre Norton novel of the same name. If you want to think of it as just sharing the same name and general idea then you would be in the right dimensional plane. The Beastmaster film more resembles a Dungeons and Dragons campaign with one overpowered druid aided by a group of lesser powerful followers that can only really fight when they strip their clothes completely. The Dungeons and Dragons conspiracy continues as The Beastmaster plot is a series of non-repeating encounters overcome by heroic abilities and revolving around a cosmically unbelievable antagonist. Time to roll for initiative.

Dar — A Manowar’s Man

The film focuses on Dar, royal orphan who is taken under the wing of a simple villager after being born from a cow because he was placed there by a witch who stole him from the Queen’s womb because there was no goddamn security at the front of the royal tent. Dar, as a boy, learns the virtues of boomerang throwing and animal husbandry. He also learns the sense in plowing fields that are way fucking far from the village than when the evil monster army raids his home, Dar spends all goddamn day running back to save his family. Idiot. Dar is so devastated by witnessing his whole village being slaughtered that he sets out to avenge his step-family´s memory unaware that this journey is a part of a larger destiny. Oh, and also, he picks up some friends along the way.

I spend a little bit of time recounting the plot because, honestly, it is humorous to see written out. The film’s narrative is so ludicrous that it becomes almost comical and charming when set into motion. The film is quite obviously the byproduct of a fantasy created by a younger writer. I mean what 15 year old wouldn’t use their animal familiars to steal women´s clothing? That is why they are there right? Idiot.

“Torn attended Texas A & M and the University of Texas, where he majored in animal husbandry” ..wait, really?

The Beastmaster fails in a spectacular amount of places but also offers things Red Sonja was incapable of doing. The film blunders basic action in ways that are staggering to the mind. The fight choreography looks like it was written and executed by 8 year olds who half remembered something they saw on TV. None of the character´s motivation for their actions are ascertainable and the threat of an evil cultist priest is sort of muted by the fact that at any time a group of school children or 10 determined senior citizens could overcome his legion. Add to this action scenes that seem like they were written at gunpoint and resolutions to those actions that couldn’t exist in 95% of fantasy films and one has on goddamn entertaining film.

As much as it fails, The Beastmaster also succeeds because of it’s undeniable charm. Unlike Red Sonja and even Conan, people can relate to Dar as a protagonist being a projection of what one would look like if they inhabited a fantasy or role playing game. Can you imagine the hit dice your spray painted tiger would get or the perception bonus that would come with a damn eagle hawk? Though everything in the film only connects half of the time, The Beastmaster, as an idea, is too lovable to deny. Now, I said this without seeing the two sequels. One being the group transported to 1980 Los Angeles, the other being the Canadian TV show which aired in the late 90´s. For now, I am content with my character sheet and an easily conquerable foe. Mighty beasts, hear my painfully feeble war call.

Oh, for the love of fuck, I forgot about him….

Posted in Film Review | Tagged Beastmaster, Hollywood Metal, Kaptain Carbon |

REVIEW: AMORPHIS

Posted on May 8, 2013 by Kaptain Carbon

Amorphis – Circle (2013)

Amorphis
Album: Circle
Released: April 19th, 2013
Label: Nuclear Blast
Website: Facebook

Score: 5/9 Hammers

Amorphis. Alright. It is sort of strange reviewing a new record from a band whose older material lives in such legacy. 1994′s Tales of a Thousand Lakes is cited as a pioneering example of melodic death. Then there is everything else the band did. Since Amorphis has been consistently releasing material since the early 90′s it is difficult to sum up their narrative in a few sentences. One way to breakup the band’s history is to mark 2006 as an end and beginning with the release of Eclipse. It is here the band began a core lineup that would remain stable up through 2013 with the release of Circle — the band’s 11th album and their 3rd decade in existence.

As I said before, Amorphis’ lineup stabilized in the mid 00′s as well as adopted lyrical help from Finnish poets. 2006′s Eclipse was based around the work of 80′s playwright Paavo Haavikko, which was based on the Kaleval, the finnish national epic. The Kaleval served as inspiration for early Amoprhis work but would remain strong for the next few albums. Fininish poet Pekka Kainulainen wrote the next three Amorphis records based on the Kaleval with rousing success. The last three records from the band have peaked at number 1 on the finnish charts. The Fins love their history and also the sound of clean and harsh progressive folk death. Kainulainen’s work with Amorphis continues on Circle, which is the first time the bad has adopted a non traditional concept for their records. According to Kainulainen, the story revolves around a star crossed protagonist who finds himself through time travel and spiritual transcendence. Wait really? All of this told through the lens of progressive melodic folk death?

What ever happened from the early 90′s to now is history, as the band wears their past achievements around their necks like souvenirs. Progressive accessibility, folk melodies, and short bursts of harsh melodic death lie in spread throughout Circle. The dense and planned construction of the record is near exquisite. Each part is designed to intrigue and release the perfect amount of accessibility and dissonance. Given the story, the rhythm of the music matches perfectly. I just wish I enjoyed it more.

Aside from songs like “Narrow Path” and “Nightbird’s Song” the majority of Circle and I have agreed to disagree. It is not that any of these are poor songs. As I mentioned before, Circle’s construction is fascinating and its songwriting is effective and impeccable. My break with Circle stems from a personal taste with melodic vocals and hard progressive choruses. I just do not care. This is the same aversion that has kept me away from Dream theater and anything that Arjen Anthony Lucassen is involved with. Aside from the already mentioned exceptions, Circle just feels unchallenging, unconvincing, and sort of a drag. This is, of course, personal taste.

My mutual break with Amorphis is only disappointing given the amount of work and energy the band puts into the records. The band’s continual dedication to alternative progressive melodic folk death despite lineup changes is inspiring. While I was not upset or pained throughout the entirety of Circle, my level of interest never rose above underwhelmed. If you are looking for something similar to Tales of a Thousand Lakes you might be in the wrong place. If you are looking for a continuation of the band’s past 5 years, I may be the wrong person to ask if it’s good.

Posted in Reviews | Tagged AMORPHIS, circle, Hollywood Metal, Kaptain Carbon |

FILM REVIEW: RED SONJA

Posted on April 23, 2013 by Kaptain Carbon

RED SONJA
Released: July 3, 1985
Directed By: Richard Fleischer
Starring: Brigitte Nielsen, Arnold Schwarzenegger
Website: IMDB

Score: 3/9 Hammers

“I do not need the help of any man,” said the heroine who is always in need of constant help from men.

It is hard to revisit the 1985 sword and sorcery film Red Sonja with any sort of freshness. The movie, historically, has been comically criticized for decades and stands as an example of Hollywood´s eagerness to cash in on previous genre successes. There is even a quote from the films “star,” Arnold Schwarzenegger, about Red Sonja being the worst film he has done and is now used as a punishment for his kids. Where do I go from here? Where does anyone go from here? My previous review of Fire and Ice basically lauded the sword and sorcery film genre as an escapist vehicle unfettered by story and conceptual flaws. Could the same sentiment hold up under the weight of a poorly executed blockbuster? Could the same sentiment hold up to probably one of the worst fantasy films ever made?

Red Sonja is a character best defined by comic books written by Fire and Ice / Conan writer Roy Thomas along with one of my favorite fantasy artists Barry Windsor Smith. The character was loosely based on a variety of pulp heroines pioneered by short stories from Robert E Howard. Red Sonja, now, stands as the female equivalent to Conan and shares the same fictional universe during the Hyborian Age. The important thing to remember about sword and sorcery is that despite instances of brutal violence carried out by demonic aggressors and less than favorable clothing for both genders, females have a surprisingly fair amount of power. Barbarian heroines are just as strong as males and can make decisions and carry the plot without male involvement. Despite a ridiculous amount of sexual exploitation, sword and sorcery breaks the majority of female stereotypes and did so years before other fantasy genres. This is important to remember when watching the cosmic disaster known as Red Sonja.

Red Sonja and Cona--...um...Lord Kalidor.

Red Sonja and Cona–…wait….um….Lord Kalidor.

To investigate why Red Sonja is so bad one has to look at individual aspects of the film. The story is not the problem as Red Sonja’s plot is standard sword and sorcery revenge involving magic, immediate scope, and visceral adventure. In fact, I am trying to think of a film genre less simplistic than sword and sorcery. A green glowing magical orb is sought after by a group of roving warriors while an evil Sorceress, Queen Gedren, uses it to conquer kingdoms. The film´s heroine is hellbent on revenge after seeing her family slaughtered by the aforementioned sorceress. Pretty simple. There may be a comic duo planted for laughs but all in all standard. While the costume design is silly bordering on psychotic and its action sequences are quickly approaching narcoleptic, Red Sonja could have been an enjoyable film. Its critical weakness does not rest in any one part, but rather many aspects executed together cause its downfall.

One of the most cited examples of Red Sonja´s ineptness is the acting, which oscillates between laughable and embarrassing. The wooden exchanges between characters merely drag the plot further much in the same way a mortally wounded human would lurch across a floor gasping for air. Scratch that. Dungeon. Bridget Neilson, who has the muscular build of a fine heroine fails to outact an 8 year old side character and the underwater machine serpent sent to kill her. Take this and combine it with a universal battle over which antagonist, the evil Queen Gedren or her smarmy advisor Ikol, is more uninteresting and ridiculously dressed. Do not forget characters placed on set with no logic or reason or ones that would have made the series more interesting if more was known about them and you have a colossal trainwreck of a film. Scratch that. Horsewreck. It is also important to realize this does not make the film truly terrible. what makes this film truly terrible is the attempt of a feminist agenda. Scratch that. Sabotage.

One of the largest disappointments in the film is realization that side character are vastly more interesting than the protagonists.

One of the largest disappointments in the film is realization that side characters and occasional set scenery are vastly more interesting than the protagonists.

Aside from the already stated sword and sorcery base of a strong female character, Red Sonja, the film, continuously undermines any instance of a female lead doing anything without the help of a man. This aspect is seen in most fantasy films but becomes more obvious when Red Sonja is supposedly centered around the plights of a strong female. Whether or not saved at the last second by Lord Kalidor from Lord Brytag´s men or narrowly escaping the collapsing castle saved only by the combined brute strength of two sweaty men holding up heavy things, Red Sonja fails to convince the audience she wouldn’t choke on her food or stab herself with a fork if not fed by a strong male.

It is important to note that I do not strive to pick out themes of feminism within fantasy films. It is an interesting field of thought, but a film can exist without critical analysis. My cross section into this film is because Red Sonja’s waffling between feminism and misogyny is so abrupt the analysis is almost inescapable. Rather than silently attempt to create a female Conan, Red Sonja stmblefucks its way to the winners circle taking the trophy for the strangest blunder one has ever put to film. The universal orphanage fire that is Red Sonja has not, however, derailed any longevity of its protagonist. Red Sonja, the character, is still seen in better written media and fawned over at comic and fantasy conventions by both men and women. Despite the films best efforts to stamp out a successful female protagonist, Red Sonja, the idea, luckily lives on.

Posted in Film Review | Tagged Hollywood Metal, Kaptain Carbon, Red Sonja |

REVIEW: OMNIUM GATHERUM

Posted on April 17, 2013 by Kaptain Carbon

Omnium Gatherum – Beyond (2013)

Omnium Gatherum
Album: Beyond
Released: February 23rd, 2013
Label: Lifeforce Records
Website: Facebook

Score: 5/9 Hammers

Yet another band who I sort of mumble their name whenever I speak or talk to others about. I may do internet searches by just pounding out “omnomnomnom gatherum” and waiting for the autocorrect to lead me in the right direction. We are back after some frightful excursions to Lightning Swords of Death’s satanic dungeon and Paysage D’Hiver’s hunting cabin next to the outer realm of non-being. Once again we are under red skies in the majestic glens of melodic death. A place where golden mountains shimmer like ocean waves at dawn. It is time to leave any descriptions of “alienating,” “dissonant,” or “abstract” and bask in the warm glow of the Elysian fields. Or Finland. Whatever.

Om-ni-um Ga-ther-um is a Finnish melodic death act who has been held together by two core members. Total Devastation drummer Jarmo Pikka and In-som-ni-um guitarist Markus Vahala. Outside of those two members, the band has switched out keyboards, bassists, other guitarists, and even vocalists. The instability of the lineup makes it difficult to compare their body of work but the closest relative to the band’s sixth record Beyond is 2011’s New World Shadows. As if urged by a greater cause, Omnium Gatherum is attempting to both predicate and build the future — a place where guitarwork and synth become fused together and everything sounds like music from Final Fantasy VII.

I enjoyed New World Shadows. Compared to 2008′s The Red Shift and previous albums, the new subtle style offered a more melodic and ornamented style. While synth has always been a part of the band’s style, the work in 2005′s Years in Waste feels merely formative compared to New World Shadows and Beyond. For a record marching under the melodic death banner, I see no problem in it moving at the speed of light and at the consistency of water flowing gently over smooth stones.

Beyond is a record with both shortcomings and strengths. Its strong points are in the complete melding of keyboard and guitar work. Beyond, like its predecessor, transcends time in its instrumental passages to create something that, oddly made me gasp in excitement. I already made a video game joke but the heavy use of synth / guitar echoes the soundscapes of Playstation, Sega Saturn, and Atari Jaguar. The instrumental sections on Beyond are absolutely breathtaking and more than deserve their right for attention. This contrasts sadly against the other less impressive aspects of the record.

The vocals from Jukka Pelkonen worked on albums like 2007′s Stuck Here on Snake Ways and even to some lesser degree 2008′s The Red Shift. But while I just mentioned the softening and refinement of the instrumental sections, the gruff vocals have increasingly become alienated from the sound. At points through Beyond the vocals feel stumbling between guitar solos and interrupt the album’s flow. This happened with New World Shadows and continues throughout Beyond. This is a shame because the range in distortion and the gravely texture exhibited by Pelkonen would be better complimented if it wasn’t for so much atmosphere of soothing rushing water.

Omnium Gatherum (first time typing that correctly) feels like a band in transition from a competent melodic death act into something more progressive, interesting, and possibly made of polygons. Though Beyond feels less sure of itself than previous records, it has not been until the band’s more recent albums where I have been able to find them in the vast melodic death glens. The cover paintings from onetime vocalist Olli Lappalainen is may seem incidental yet Beyond’s cover is striking and most importantly memorable. They are starting to become recognizable. Hey, it’s a large place and somewhere I wish to make my home. As long as I can get to Paysage D’Hiver’s hunting cabin from here I will be fine.